This is especially for those who have lived in michigan... and for those who lived too close for comfort.

In the tradition of Jeff Foxworthy's "You might be a Redneck" list. Here's a handy guide that can help you figure out if you or someone you know is from the state of Michigan.

You MAY be a Michigander if...

If you define Summer as three months of bad sledding...

If your definition of a small town is one that doesn't have a lake...

If your family breaks into violence during a UM-MSU game.

If snow tires came standard on all your cars....

If at least 50% of your relatives work for the auto industry...

If you have ever gotten frostbitten and sunburned in the same week...

If you can identify an Ohio accent...

If owning a Japanese car was a hanging offense in your home town...

If you learned to pilot a boat before the training wheels came off your bike...

If you think Alkaline batteries were named after a Tiger outfielder...

If you point at the palm of your right hand when telling people where you grew up...

If you don't understand what the big deal about Chicago is...

If someone asks you if you've ever been to Europe, and you answer, "No, but I've been to Ann Arbor..."

If "Down South" to you means Toledo...

If you have any idea who Bob Ufer was...

If octupus and hockey go together as logically as hot dogs and baseball...

If travelling coast to coast means going from Port Huron to Muskegon...

If you refer to your relatives in southern Michigan as "Trolls" or "Lopers"...

If the "Big Three" can mean either Ford, Chrysler and GM or Dominos, Little Ceaser's and Hungry Howie's...

If the Big Mac is something you can drive across...

If you have no problem spelling Mackinac Island...

If you had to get a passport to travel to Ohio...

If you have as many Canadian coins in your pocket as American coins...

If you kids' baseball game has ever been snowed out...

If the trees in your backyard have spigots...

If you know that a place called Kalamazoo actually exists...

If you bake with "soda" and drink "pop"...

If you know what a pastie is...

If you drive 70 in bumper to bumper traffic and always pass on the right...

If your favorite hockey team's mascot is an octopus...

If you have a favorite hockey team...

If you don't have a coughing fit from one sip of Vernor's...

If you know how to play Euchre...

by David M Stein


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